Women - of course the fairer sex...

When I was in school, we had a story in language text book… A father, not-so-educated businessman wanted his daughter to study more, so that she can get good husband for her… BUT the mother did not want her to study further, though she had good education…. !!!! WHY? Her reasoning to herself was that… if she can not save her daughter from suffering…. at least she can make her beloved ignorant from those troubles…. !!!! I didn’t understand it much at that age, but gradually realized what the author meant…. A daughter-in-law in a family is a second class citizen always.

When I saw ‘Dil Chahta Hai’…. I thought, I never had such freedom, rather none of us… It is said among women that, their life starts with the dos and don’ts (more of don’ts) of father, later it’s from husband and then son…. So always she has to follow the pattern pre-decided….

While we bought our new house, I went to buy some utensils with my mother. It’s a custom to write down name on the steel utensils, so that they don’t get lost. I have seen all the utensils of my mother’s kitchen containing my father’s name on it and in my grandma’s kitchen, grandpa’s name. I told, I want my name on them, it’s my kitchen after all. My own mother, my greatest well-wisher, a B. Sc. with Physics, worked with PRL…. argued a lot on that and then we compromised on writing down my full name, which anyway includes my hubby’s name… :-)

Here we cannot and should not blame anyone or anything in particular. That’s the mentality passing down from generation to generation… so much hard-wired in the society that no one even realize what’s wrong with that !!!! Including women themselves…. ! They also believe the same and behave on that…. The situation is like this…. a person who is deaf from birth, doesn’t learn to speak even though their voice-box and other system is in place and perfect…. ‘Cause they have never heard anything that they can learn to speak, right? Same way, our society has never heard from their elders of the status and respect a woman deserves…. And even when they learn to think independently, it is still influenced by the mindset and ideas they have acquired during the past years within the environment, upbringing, family, education…..

BUT here I beg to differ slightly…. On second thought…. after many experiences and seeing the world around…. I also think…. That mentality of keeping myself in a shell has protected me always. Kept me safe from many unwanted, undesired experiences and situations in life. Has let me stay innocent still. So I am thankful to my parents for teaching me the same. Now when I am grown up enough to think independently… I wish I can balance between my independence and my responsibilities.